Magical Ingredient That Makes Every Dish Tastier

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I was not raised by a skilled cook. My mother’s idea of pasta was to pour ketchup over overcooked noodles. For a green vegetable, she would open a can of string beans.

I, on the other hand, am obsessed with food. I think about it all the time. When I’m trying to fall asleep, I calm myself by planning the next day’s meals. If I’m going out to dinner, I increase my enjoyment by going online and studying every item on the menu before we even get there.

When I watch Chopped, I stand up and scream when a chef accidentally burns something, just like a football fan stands up and screams at a foul. I can relay all the details of every great meal I’ve ever had, especially the ones in foreign countries. When people ask me what I want for my birthday, my answer is always the same: a dinner invitation.

I love everything about the culinary arts except one thing: Like my mother before me, I hate to cook. Remember that show, 30-Minute Meals? Who has 30 minutes? I would pay extra for a house without a kitchen.

I don’t want to slice, I don’t want to dice, and I don’t want to spice. I have more important things to do, like trying to figure out the answers to The New York Times’ Connection game. Also, so many recipes demand ingredients that I don’t even know where to purchase. I just read one for a vegetable soup that required rutabaga, parsnips, Swiss chard, Italian kale, and — wait for it — Parmigiano Reggiano rind! Seriously?

I am deeply grateful for all those ready-made foods like Costco’s roast chicken, Trader Joe’s frozen lasagna, and Ralph’s sushi bowls. And my favorite way to end the day is to sip an Aperol Spritz in an outdoor café while waiting for my lobster tacos.

We can’t afford to eat out or get take-out every night, so how do I get food on the table? For starters, I’m lucky enough to have a husband. When I announced a few years ago that I was retiring from kitchen duties, Benni bravely stepped up to the (dinner) plate. I plan the menus and do the shopping. Benni is not a talented chef, but he can throw together a simple meal of grilled pork tenderloin, baked potato and a mixed green salad. And he even does the cleanup afterwards — sort of.

Since we need to keep things quick and easy, we have developed a repertoire of few-ingredient-minimum-fuss dishes that always satisfy. Here’s our greatest, most spectacular, most useful solution: a jar of salsa.

Salsa is a magical ingredient that makes everything better. It contains the basic essentials of a zillion dishes: tomatoes, garlic, onion, chili, lime and (in some brands) cilantro. A jar of it relieves you of the drudgery of shopping, peeling, chopping and washing up. PERFECT!

You want some guacamole? Just mash an avocado with some salsa.

You want meatloaf? Just mix a pound of ground turkey with a jar of salsa.

You want a spicy appetizer? Toss some ready-cooked shrimp with some salsa.

You want some gazpacho? Just blend yesterday’s leftover salad with some salsa.

How about pasta sauce with a little kick? Take a jar of marinara, and add some — you guessed it — salsa.

Having people for brunch? Impress your guests with homemade quesadillas. Spread some salsa and pre-shredded cheese on a small tortilla. (You can add some ham or turkey, if you like.) Fold it closed and bake for a few minutes until it’s crispy outside and melty inside. Yum!

I also do a dessert version of these quesadillas with Nutella and peanut butter. (No salsa here, just a trillion calories!) These chocolate treats are a lot easier to whip up than — God forbid — a cake!

Who doesn’t love salmon? We have made Julia Child’s oh-so-simple poached salmon a kazillion times. You just boil some water with 1 1/2 teaspoons salt and 3 tablespoons white wine vinegar. Throw some salmon filets in the pot, and simmer six minutes for every half-inch. It never fails to wow!

Here’s a simple sauce to serve with salmon, chicken, eggs or anything: plain Greek yogurt, chopped garlic, chopped mint, salt to taste and maybe some diced cucumber if I’m feeling ambitious.

Then there’s a genius dessert with only one ingredient. Cut up a ripe banana and stick it in the freezer. When it’s frozen, just throw it in the blender and voila! A yummy ice cream/sherbert hybrid with no sugar or dairy. (In the spirit of full disclosure, I do add a little skimmed milk to make it creamy.)

Here’s another simple frozen dessert: Mix some vanilla frozen yogurt in the processor with a ripe papaya (or mango or pineapple). Add a little rum, and serve in wine glasses. Easy-peasy but deceptively elegant!

Occasionally, I’ve been foolish enough to forego my usual kitchen aversion and face the challenge of being a domestic goddess. Last year, in a moment of total insanity, I invited eight people for Thanksgiving, and I made everything from scratch.

I brined the turkey, I peeled the yams, I rinsed the cranberries and I ironed the vintage cloth napkins. The preparation took a week; the cleanup took another week. All this for an event that was over in an eyeblink of three hours. And by the way, the white meat was dry. Never again!

 
Do you use salsa in your meals? Would you try it? Let us know in the comments below.